Social Behavior

What to do for Improving your Self-Esteem in Relationships? – 10 Best Ways

Did you know that improving your self-esteem in relationships is “Magical” for a happy life? Low self-esteem sabotages your relationships because due to low self-esteem, trust issues and insecurities arise and ruin the relationships, specifically love relationships. Unless you work on your self-esteem, you cannot create a healthy balance in your life.

Improving your self-esteem in relationships is associated with many factors involving self-independence, problems solving skills, good communication skills, fixing a lack of trust in relationships, knowing your needs as well as of your partner, and setting healthy boundaries and goals for your life. A lot of more aspects and things to tell yourself to boost self-esteem can help in improving your self-esteem in relationships.

“Sometimes to appreciate, experience, and love yourself, you need to take a break from everyone and spend time alone,” Robert Tew says.

Self-esteem is often assumed the same as self-image, self-confidence, and self-compassion. Understanding’ what self-esteem precisely means?’ is important before moving towards improving your self-esteem in relationships.

What is self-esteem in a relationship?

improving your self-esteem in relationshipsSelf-esteem in a relationship is not only thinking about yourself but also about your spouse or love partner. The self-esteem of both of you decides whether this relationship is long-lasting or not. High Self-esteem enables you to think about yourself and your satisfaction from the relationship and also the aspect that how you treat others and how you love them while being in a relationship.

You should accept yourself and consider yourself worthy of receiving the love. High self-esteem in a relationship enables you to value yourself and comfortably take the time and attention of your partner without thinking that why would someone waste his time on a worthless and undeserving person.

According to Research, “self-esteem affects your satisfaction from the relationship as much as it affects your partner’s satisfaction.”

Self-worth is considering yourself valuable and worthy of respect and love, self-confidence is being sure about your skills and trusting in yourself, self-compassion is understanding your perspective and fulfilling your needs and wants. In contrast, self-esteem is somewhat a little different from all these concepts.

What is the importance of improving your self-esteem in relationships?

Improving your self-esteem in relationships is important because you can never bring happiness and complacency to your life until having high self-esteem. The reason for most love relationship disputes is the low self-esteem that can give rise to insecurity, arguments, unhealthy balance, ineffective communication, lack of trust, jealousy, fear of losing your partner, and many more intimacy problems in a relationship. The relationship might become abusive, intolerant, and uncooperative, which is difficult for both of you to handle.

It is evident from the Research that high self-esteem is beneficial for romantic relationships and has a positive effect on partners’ happiness and satisfaction from the relationship.

Manipulative, inconsistent, and interfering behavior due to low self-esteem destroys the tenderness of a relationship. Consequently, it is necessary to work on improving your self-esteem in relationships individually as well as together with your partner.

Research shows that self-esteem and social relationships are interlinked. Positive relationships, support, and social acceptances help develop self-esteem, and when the quality of social relationships is low, it also affects the other factor.

Therefore, develop good positive relationships and work on improving your self-esteem in relationships. High self-esteem in relationships enhances understanding with your partner, brings happiness, and strengthens your relationships.

What causes low self-esteem in a relationship?

improving your self esteem in relationshipsSelf-esteem can be higher at one stage of life and lower at another and varies due to different happenings or experiences of life. Some of the causes and reasons of low self-esteem include negative self-talk, a disheartening failure, rejection, poor academic record, bullying and mocking from fellows, a denied child in childhood, any medical or mental issues, toxic and abusive past relationships, and many more.

All these are some basic causes that can raise the signs of low self-esteem in your personality and negatively impact your present relationships. Self-esteem is strongly associated with the happenings of your life and how you react to these occurrences. Try improving your self-esteem in relationships and learn how to improve your self-esteem in a relationship?

Ways for improving your self-esteem in relationships

Some basic behaviors and aspects could help in improving your self-esteem in relationships. Assimilate the following 10 things to boost self-esteem in relationships and enhance contentment.

1. Support your partner in difficult times

Until one person genuinely supports you in tough times, you will never have low self-esteem. For a satisfactory and happy relationship, you must make comfort for your partner. It will make your relationship reliable and improve your self-esteem. If you are facing any difficulty, talk about it with your partner. It is no shame to take their help and support.

A truly loving and understanding partner will always give support and courage to you that will substantiate effectiveness in improving your self-esteem in relationships.

People who have low self-esteem in relationships don’t consider themselves apt to support anyone and, as a result, break the expectations of their partner, which will consequently become the cause of wrecking relationships.

2. Appreciate each other on achievements

improving your self esteem in relationshipsAppreciation is a factor that is most significant in improving your self-esteem in relationships. Give and take genuine and sincere compliments because these compliments can change someone’s perspective about themselves. Not only wait for anything special to happen so that you can appreciate your partner, rather find little aspects of cultivating euphoria and contentment in your life by admiring them.

For instance, compliment your wife like you are looking gorgeous in this outfit, or you can praise your man by saying that your new haircut is incredibly awesome or you are looking stunning in this look. You can also compliment your partner’s hard work by appreciating like you are an extraordinarily hard worker or you genuinely have a creative mind. These little appreciations will positively impact self-esteem and help you enhance self-esteem in romantic relationships.

3. Give each other some space

If you want to learn and master how to overcome low self-esteem in a relationship, the foremost thing to do is give your partner some privacy and space. Stop being insecure and afraid of losing your special one due to your low self-esteem. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean sticking with your partner all the time and is not essential to improving your self-esteem together.

According to Karen Salmanohn, a self-help book author and designer, sometimes a little space, distance, and time is what a relationship needs to bloom at its best.

Sometimes, there are better chances of growing up in life and enhancing your self-esteem. Therefore, make sure not to bound yourself or your partner and live freely by keeping faith in yourself. Endeavor for it because low self-esteem in relationships affects your life and serenity.

4. Eliminate the jealousy factor

It is a trait of people with low self-esteem that they get jealous of others’ personalities, characters, skills, talents, achievements and feel envious of everything even they are better than them. Eliminate this trait of being jealous for improving your self-esteem in relationships.

It is no secret that everyone wishes to be better, which is completely agreeable, but to start comparing yourself to other friends or connections of your partner is degrading yourself.

Don’t change yourself for the sake of others, the one who truly loves you will accept you as you are. Build up confidence in your love for having high self-esteem in a relationship.

5. Keep trust and faith in your partner

improving your self esteem in relationshipsGoing through low self-esteem in relationships? Analyze the cause and reckon what is causing this low self-esteem behavior? Do you completely trust your partner? Or do you consider yourself worthy of loving and being with? Self-compassion is widely required to know what you need and expect for yourself. When you know these things, you are satisfied with yourself and can believe your partner. Conversely, when you trust your partner, it means that you have high self-esteem, and you contemplate yourself as lovable and winsome.

According to Anton Chekhov, a Russian playwright, and short-story writer, you must trust and believe people; otherwise, life becomes impossible.

Trust issues are the effects of low self-esteem that undermine a healthy relationship; therefore, for improving your self-esteem in relationships, you need to keep faith in your partner.

6. Learn new things together

Traits of high self-esteem should be practiced so that a relationship can thrive properly. Improving your self-esteem in relationships involves accepting challenges and trying out new things in your life with your partner. A relationship thrives when both of you boost up your confidence together by completing a specific task or doing any adventure.

Get out of your comfort zone and daily routine to boost your self-esteem because increasing your self-esteem increases your confidence. Spent time together, learn new things, and give an encouraging pat on the back of your partner. It will certainly help you in improving self-esteem in romantic relationships.

7. Be your support and ally

You might need the support of others at a stage of your life but also have to support others at the same time. What will you do then? Do you act cowardly and sit calmly by considering yourself ineligible for doing anything for your loved ones? No, you have to build up your self-esteem by motivating yourself. You have to be your cheerleader for improving your self-esteem in relationships.

“If your love for someone does not include loving yourself, your love is incomplete,” Shannon L. Alder says.

Your biggest support is you, and your choices matter the most. Be kind to yourself, do positive self-talk, and believe that it is under your leverage to do anything you want to do willingly.

8. Give importance to yourself

improving your self esteem in relationshipsDo you think that you can work on improving your self-esteem in relationships without giving importance to yourself? Never.

In relationships, people having low self-esteem are always trying to please others because they consider themselves unfit in others’ lives. If you want to learn how to improve your self-esteem in a relationship, give some importance to yourself. Take credit and praise for the good things that happen because of you or anything you did yourself. No one gives you worth or value until you give it to yourself.

According to Oscar Wilde, an Irish poet, and playwright, Never love someone who treats you like you are ordinary.

If your partner does something lovely to please you, then along with being gratified, also think that there is something special in you that is why they are doing it. This will boost your confidence and obliterate the effects of low self-esteem in a relationship.

9. Express what you feel in the right way

Hiding what you feel, not sharing with your partner, keeping it yourself, and assuming the reasons yourself are some of the main causes of jeopardizing relationships. If you are feeling anything and not clear about it, be courageous enough to say it before your partner.

Develop communication skills and confidence to speak up your heart for improving your self-esteem in relationships.

If you are feeling insecure, admit it. If you feel left out or treated with contempt, talk about it. You will keep having low self-esteem in relationships until you start expressing your true inner self. If you keep things to yourself and stress about it, it will lead to different mental health problems.

10. Accept your partner as they are

improving your self esteem in relationshipsLove is never easy; it always comes with challenges and ups and downs. High self-esteem in relationships is essential, and therefore, never try to change your partners. Accept them with all the good and bad obsessions they have. You can make them realize and change anything not good for them or their life but merely forcing them to change themselves for you is not good.

It leaves an impression of being dominant over them, and no one wants to be in a controlling relationship. If any conflict happens, use your problem-solving and communication skills, and find a solution together. Don’t try to be over perfect because mistakes are a part of life. So, accept the reality, admit your flaws, and understand your partner for improving your self-esteem in relationships.


Many searches are being made daily on improving your self-esteem in relationships, so here are some frequently asked questions in this concern.

Q: How to improve your self-esteem as a woman?

Stop being judgmental to yourself, appreciate, value, and love yourself, never compare yourself to others for improving your self-esteem as a woman. Keep faith and belief in yourself that you can do it and accept the challenges of life.

Q: How to overcome low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem causes many mental issues and health problems, but you can overcome it and improve your self-esteem. Always give priority to your opinion because it matters the most. It doesn’t matter what others think or say, therefore, stop the comparison and avoid negative self-talk. Learn a new beneficial skill every day to boost your self-esteem.

Q: What causes low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem can be caused by many factors, including any toxic past relationship, bad company, childhood trauma, the incomplete desire to attain love and attention in childhood, or any abusive relationship. Regardless of anything, focus on your personality and love yourself.

Q: Is my low self-esteem ruining my relationship?

Yes, low self-esteem can ruin a relationship because a person with low self-esteem has trust issues with their partners and get jealous if they get close to their friends, etc. Due to low self-esteem, people need approval from their partner on every little thing and have no belief in themselves, which gets frustrating many times and can ruin a healthy relationship.

Q: What are the signs of a man with low self-esteem?

By the signs of low self-esteem in a man, you can identify individuals around you suffering from low self-esteem. They avoid social gatherings, cannot express their thoughts, compare themselves with others, are afraid of getting failed, have no courage to take risks, and consider themselves unworthy to be loved and respected.

Q: Can a person with low self-esteem love?

A person with low self-esteem can love others, but he cannot love himself. They have feelings for others and want to develop a good relationship but ruin the relationship due to their low self-esteem. Their unconfident and unconscious behavior makes others get far apart from them.

Final words

High self-esteem is essential to be attained on an individual level and while being in a relationship. Hopefully, these ways will surely help you in improving your self-esteem in relationships. I hope that you get confident, bold, and courageous to handle and maintain a healthy relationship after helping each other in improving self-esteem. Best of luck with your future life.

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