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What are the Signs of Low Self-Esteem in a Man? – 11 Prominent Signs

Want to know about the signs of low self-esteem in a man? Or what are the effects of low self-esteem? Low self-esteem and low self-confidence can coalesce many times, but low self-esteem is somewhat different that must be improved as we know that self-esteem is what you think about yourself. Therefore, low self-esteem is having a negative perception of yourself, and you should understand the signs of low self-esteem in a man.

A statement was given by William James, an American philosopher, and psychologist, in 1980 that “Self-esteem is the satisfaction or dissatisfaction with oneself.”

Many people face low self-esteem but don’t want to express it before others and never talk about it. You have never seen someone saying, ‘I’m a man with low self-esteem, but you can identify them if you know the signs of low self-esteem in a man and thoroughly understand what low self-esteem is?

What is low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem means that someone lacks confidence and lacks love and consideration for himself. They feel unloved, unhappy, unmotivated, and dissatisfied with themselves and keep comparing themselves with others. Many people lose their confidence in difficult life situations, but the effects of low self-esteem emerge most of the time. All these are the basic signs of low self-esteem in a man.

signs of low self-esteem in a man

People having low self-esteem judge themselves harshly and feel shy, confused, nervous, and embarrassed in front of others. That’s why they stay away from social gatherings and avoid meeting new people. They will keep saying negative statements about themselves. Such as;

  • How can I do this?
  • I can never manage all this project.
  • I am not eligible for this job, and my skills are not so good to be valued.
  • I will never be a good life partner.
  • No one loves me because I am not worthy of it.
  • I am ugly, fat, or unfit for anyone talented and beautiful.

Low self-esteem in a man makes him feel awful and negative that should be stopped to live a serene and joyful life.

What is the impact of low self-esteem on the quality of life?

Low self-esteem in a man has a huge impact on the quality of life. People with physical signs of low self-esteem keep feeling awful and stressed about themselves. The quality of their lives decreases because they fear rejection and don’t consider themselves competent and eligible to do anything.

It is also one of the signs of low self-esteem in a man that they cannot keep an ongoing healthy relationship. They believe and consider that they are not good enough for their partners, and that’s why their partners will give up on them and move on. They face trust issues, insecurity, and jealousy from others because of their low self-esteem and self-confidence.

A study was conducted, and evidence illustrates that high self-esteem leads to good social behavior and health. But low self-esteem leads to different social problems and mental disorders, including depression, suicidal inclinations, anxiety, violence, abuse, and eating disorders.

Low self-esteem makes him feel scared of taking risks and challenges in life. He is scared of trying new things and has a fear of rejection in his mind and heart before initiating anything. He often feels anger, stress, depression, guilt, and criticism for himself. These are some physical signs of low self-esteem in a man that badly impact a happy and serene life quality.

What causes low self-esteem in a man?

Signs of low self-esteem in a man can be detected by analyzing his behavior and thoughts. There can be numerous causes that result in low self-esteem behaviors and make someone feels irritated about himself.

signs of low self-esteem in a man

The following aspects can be considered a cause of emerging signs of low self-esteem in a man.

  • It might be because of any toxic or unworthy past relationship.
  • Low self-esteem can result from having any mental illness or facing disorders for a long time.
  • Due to childhood trauma, punishments, abuse, mishap, or any accident that breaks your confidence.
  • Toxic friends and family members disrespect you and always make you feel vulnerable.
  • Never received proper care, love, and affection from parents and that’s why desires to get love and affection from others.
  • Any stressful situation of life that is causing depression, whether related to academic, personal, professional, or financial problems.

Many more can be the causes of low self-esteem in a man and makes them feel vulnerable about themselves.
If you want to know how to overcome low self-esteem, first understand the signs of low self-esteem in a man.

Signs of low self-esteem in a man

Scientific and Training Committees of Cantho University of Medicine and Pharmacy approved a study based on identifying the impact of self-esteem on mental health problems. The results show that low self-esteem increased anxiety, suicide, and depression among adolescents.
To eliminate how to overcome low self-esteem in your life, check out the following signs of low self-esteem in a man.

1. Lack of self-confidence

One of the most prominent and clear signs of low self-esteem in a man is the lack of confidence and courage to speak up. Men with low self-esteem are never ready to deal with any complications or hardships of life. They have no courage to stand for themselves, and they always suppress their voice.

According to Marcus Garvey, a publisher, and journalist, you are defeated twice in the race of life if you have no confidence in yourself.

Low self-esteem in a man impacts his self-trust, and he doesn’t believe in himself even if he is capable of doing it satisfactorily well.

2. Avoid socializing in society

signs of low self-esteem in a man

It is also included in the effects of low self-esteem that these people have physical signs of low self-esteem and want to be alone and stay away from other people. They feel embarrassed and uncomfortable talking to others and behave nervously and awkwardly.

People with low self-esteem feel it difficult to communicate due to fear of being mocked or teased.

Therefore, most of the time, they prefer loneliness and get into a state of stress and depression.

3. Try to be extra perfect

It is a verity that no one is completely perfect always. It is human nature to make mistakes and gets things messed up. But it is one of the signs of low self-esteem in a man who tries to be perfect. They need everything to be extra perfect.

For instance, your man always wants his clothes to be properly cleaned and pressed, or he wants to eat the same way by arranging the dishes appropriately. People who don’t value themselves always try to make everything perfect to hide behind this flawless impression.

4. Becomes aggressive and jealous

Another one among the wise signs of low self-esteem in a man is jealousy and aggressive behavior. Because of the effects of low self-esteem, these people anyhow get the point related to appearance, skills, talents, personality, or career to get envious or desirous of. They will blame you and find it difficult to consent to their wrong deeds. And as a result, becomes aggressive.

According to Robert A Heinlein, an American science fiction author, a self-confident and competent person is incapable of being jealous of anything.

Is your boyfriend or husband getting jealous of your male friends? Or has he ever talked about them in a slightly jealous or mean way?

If yes, It is a ringing bell for you that he is suffering from low self-esteem and trying to hide it.

You can also learn here How to fix lack of trust in a relationship?

5. Not preferring his needs

Is your man letting his feelings and desires down? Did he ever prefer what he wants? Did he always keep himself aside from choosing the best?

If yes, then it is among the clear warning signs of low self-esteem in a man. It is good to think for others, care for others, and prioritize others. But if you have to sacrifice your needs and wants by getting fulfilled merely because you are unworthy or undeserving in your point of view, then it is an obstacle.

Due to low self-esteem, he will give no importance or value to his goals, needs, and feelings.

He faces struggle in asking what he needs because he considers himself incompetent.

6. Have trust issues in relationships

signs of low self-esteem in a man

Low self-esteem in a relationship symptoms includes having trust issues. It is one of the signs of low self-esteem in a man who is insecure about his partner. He always feels jealous and suspicious because he is not suitable for their partner.

It is proved by research that partners having low self-esteem sabotage their relationships.

Due to low self-esteem behaviors, they have a fear of losing the love and affection of their partner and never argue even if their partner is on a mistake. They consider their opinion useless and want consistent approval for everything. They feel it arduous to understand why anyone would love them?

7. Do negative self-talks

Negative self-talk is another one of the most important signs of low self-esteem in a man. They always blame themselves for everything that occurred. Due to the effects of low self-esteem, they talk ridiculously about their skills and knowledge. They don’t acknowledge their skills and talents.

According to an American actress and comedian, Edie McClurg, self-doubt kills talent.

Because of the effects of low self-esteem, these people gave a bad self-perception and a lack of acceptance for their personalities and self-image. Due to these negative self-talks, they undergo various mental health issues and physical symptoms of low self-esteem, including anxiety, stress, depression, etc.

8. Compare themselves to others

Having confidence that you are the best suitable person for your partner requires a healthy and ongoing relationship. But if your man is always comparing himself with others, it is one of the signs of low self-esteem in a man.

People with low self-esteem are always insecure about their personalities, appearance, and skills.

Desperation and distress sabotage their character and relationships. You will always find them conscious after decision-making because they compare it with others’ opinions. They have no value for their perspective and mindset.

9. Always apologizing to others

Sorry is the word that they used the most in a day. If anything happens that they have no concern with, they still find an aspect to be guilty about and apologize to others. It is good to accept your mistakes and face reality but doing it over the limit and need is degrading yourself.

One of the physical signs of low self-esteem in a man is apologetic, mostly because of an inferiority complex. They have no courage to handle a conflict, and therefore saying sorry to every little thing is their tactic.

10. Take comments negatively

Men with low self-esteem are the severest critic of themselves. They are bad at taking compliments and constructive criticism. And thinks about it negatively even if it has positive indications for them. It is difficult for them to take this sincere feedback and even positive criticism hits directly to their character.

According to Wayne Gerard Trotman, an author of novels and travel books, Sometimes, people having low self-esteem try to punish you for caring about them.

One of the most damaging signs of low self-esteem in a man is that they begin assuming positive reviews as a nasty criticism and start believing it.

11. Unsure to take responsibility

One of the well-known signs of low self-esteem in a man is his fear of taking responsibility. He is afraid of getting failed or being unable to perform the job.

signs of low self-esteem in a man

A person with low self-esteem will never agree to commit to a serious relationship or get married. He always believes that he cannot manage a situation or do a task assigned to it.

One of the best signs of low self-esteem in a man that can identify his low self-esteem is to check his reaction when given a responsibility. He finds it hard to be responsible for and gets stressed.

How to face and handle low self-esteem in a man?

If you observe your partner or a close friend and encounter any signs of low self-esteem in a man mentioned above, you should support him and help him improve his self-esteem.

You can do the following things in this regard.

  • Make him feel his worth by appreciating nicely.
  • He needs your support, so provide your love and attention without getting fed up.
  • Control your aggressiveness and behave politely.
  • Give him hope and courage and make him realize he can do everything he desires.
  • Avoid saying any hurtful and mean statements that demotivate him.
  • Understand their possessive behavior towards you and don’t get frustrated.
  • Be an empathetic person and listen to him attentively.

Hopefully, he will improve his low self-esteem with your help, care, and support.
If it is not working, you can take help from professionals to improve low self-esteem.

Research has proved that one of the most effective treatments for improving low self-esteem is Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). It is a psychological therapy that works with your behavior, feelings, and thoughts.


I am sharing some FAQs (frequently asked questions) associated with the signs of low self-esteem in a man.

Q: How to improve self-esteem?
Self-esteem can be improved by having confidence in yourself. Believe in your eligibility, skills, and talents. Stop running away from taking responsibility for life and be courageous enough to deal with all the inconveniences. Never compare yourself with others because no one is perfect and has ways of surviving life. Believe in yourself and stop thinking negatively about yourself.

Q: How do you know if a man has low self-esteem?
Many people have low self-esteem, but they try to hide it from others. You can identify them by observing their behavior. They do negative self-talk, get jealous, have trust issues in relationships, suppress their emotions and voice, have no consideration for themselves, and avoid socializing with others. These all are the signs of low self-esteem in a man.

Q: What are the 5 characteristics of someone with low self-esteem?
There are so many characteristics that illustrate low self-esteem in a man. They take constructive criticism negatively, consider themselves an unvalued and unworthy person, never take credit for their efforts, blame themselves, compare themselves with others, feel stressed and agitated, have difficulties developing relationships, etc.

Q: Can a man with low self-esteem love?
A person with low self-esteem can love others as they are also humans and have feelings, but they don’t love and admire themselves. If someone loves them, they consider themselves unworthy of their partner and destroy a healthy relationship. They always feel jealous and worthless in front of others and have a harshly critical review about themselves.

Q: What do I do if my boyfriend has low self-esteem?
You should support him and start taking small steps to make him believe in what he is. Try to improve his self-esteem by appreciating sincerely and making him proud of himself. Remove all his insecurities and treat him kindly. But if he is not showing any positive impacts and still destroying your happiness and being toxic for your life, you should move on.

Q: How do you fix low self-esteem? 

There is no proper medicine or any solution for this but you need to overcome your negative thoughts if you want to fix low self-esteem. You need to start taking care of your feelings and sentiments. Low esteem can be healed by little efforts like ignoring what people have to say bad about you or your looks etc. 

Final words

Low self-esteem behaviors impact your personal and professional life and toxicity to your healthy relationships. Focus on learning how to overcome low self-esteem to live confidently and boldly. Hopefully, you understand the signs of low self-esteem in a man and try to overcome them in your life.

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